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From the eye of the storm...
As some of you have seen I'm going to be taking a little social media hiatus, for an unknown time. Could be a week, could be two; it depends on how much time I need. I have been feeling a lot of additional anxiety and pressure, and as I wrote on all social media, I was beginning to feel like I had 100 lb weights on my chest. It was suffocating and overwhelming.
After I wrote yesterdays blog I went to check on Steve, and suddenly I had a thought. I am treating Steve like a burden, because the truth is I have let so many things pile up undone around me, that everything feels like a burden. Of course Steve's not a burden, and thankfully he knows that, it's just me feeling overwhelmed; but that's where the social media break comes in.
It's time to clear off my huge list of things I've let behind. Which I will need all the energy I have to catch up while still being present in our current state of chaos ALS brings.
So as we are laying in bed watching a movie last night, half a day into my social media cleanse; Steve suddenly says, "I can't breathe."
So many different things make Steve feel this way, I have to start with my list of explanations. I first check his color in his face. Okay he's bright red, not white or purple, so that's good. I check his vent numbers, title volume 404, that's what we want, so that's good. I check his temperature, 98.8, no fever, so that's good. It's 9 o'clock so I say, "Why don't I give you your meds and if you fall asleep it's probably anxiety, and let's see how you are in the morning.?" Ok, he says, as this is almost a regular things these days.
He isn't awake yet, but for the past two months this is happening several times a week. It's beyond exhausting for both of us, because it's a question game. Are we doing the right thing not going to the hospital? Is it anxiety? Is something brewing?
Thankfully Steve gets labs done weekly, and I can use the little information that provides us with to usually tell, but little by little it's worn the confident caregiver down to a weary, anxious, hot mess.
This is just one of the factors of what's been happening the past few months. I've written about the sore. It's obvious that his healing is improved the more often we do wound care, in fact if he takes more than one day off, it goes backwards. So we have worked out a schedule where we are doing wound care 5 days a week. Little by little, that's eating away at my energy, because as I've written about before, watching the one you love suffer being turned while cleaning a sore on his bottom; is hard.
All in all, I thought I was coping well, but turns out I wasn't really coping at all. I started putting things off since the last hospital visit which was over 2 months ago, and haven't been able to catch up with ANYTHING. It's like I'm a puppy, who can't decide which toy to play with. Should I make these orders, or get my taxes done, how about finishing my Ayurveda class (I took my final this week, finally, and then had a cupcake to celebrate), or how about.....the list is boring and goes on.
Point is, I need all the energy I have left inside of me to truly get back on track, to get Steve back on track, our life back on track.... Social media takes up a lot of my time because it's truthfully how I interact with 90% of the people we interact with.
I know Steve and I are often stretched, pulled, and tossed around so we will continue to grow and continue to inspire those around us; but in order to have that positive impact we want, we have to keep it together right now.
I will be blogging daily, because this has helped me get some accountability back in my life. Making sure I blog after I do yoga and meditate is building some consistency that I so desperately need right now.
Thanks for supporting us near and far, and for loving us. You all help us in more ways than I could ever explain.
After I wrote yesterdays blog I went to check on Steve, and suddenly I had a thought. I am treating Steve like a burden, because the truth is I have let so many things pile up undone around me, that everything feels like a burden. Of course Steve's not a burden, and thankfully he knows that, it's just me feeling overwhelmed; but that's where the social media break comes in.
It's time to clear off my huge list of things I've let behind. Which I will need all the energy I have to catch up while still being present in our current state of chaos ALS brings.
So as we are laying in bed watching a movie last night, half a day into my social media cleanse; Steve suddenly says, "I can't breathe."
So many different things make Steve feel this way, I have to start with my list of explanations. I first check his color in his face. Okay he's bright red, not white or purple, so that's good. I check his vent numbers, title volume 404, that's what we want, so that's good. I check his temperature, 98.8, no fever, so that's good. It's 9 o'clock so I say, "Why don't I give you your meds and if you fall asleep it's probably anxiety, and let's see how you are in the morning.?" Ok, he says, as this is almost a regular things these days.
He isn't awake yet, but for the past two months this is happening several times a week. It's beyond exhausting for both of us, because it's a question game. Are we doing the right thing not going to the hospital? Is it anxiety? Is something brewing?
Thankfully Steve gets labs done weekly, and I can use the little information that provides us with to usually tell, but little by little it's worn the confident caregiver down to a weary, anxious, hot mess.
This is just one of the factors of what's been happening the past few months. I've written about the sore. It's obvious that his healing is improved the more often we do wound care, in fact if he takes more than one day off, it goes backwards. So we have worked out a schedule where we are doing wound care 5 days a week. Little by little, that's eating away at my energy, because as I've written about before, watching the one you love suffer being turned while cleaning a sore on his bottom; is hard.
All in all, I thought I was coping well, but turns out I wasn't really coping at all. I started putting things off since the last hospital visit which was over 2 months ago, and haven't been able to catch up with ANYTHING. It's like I'm a puppy, who can't decide which toy to play with. Should I make these orders, or get my taxes done, how about finishing my Ayurveda class (I took my final this week, finally, and then had a cupcake to celebrate), or how about.....the list is boring and goes on.
Point is, I need all the energy I have left inside of me to truly get back on track, to get Steve back on track, our life back on track.... Social media takes up a lot of my time because it's truthfully how I interact with 90% of the people we interact with.
I know Steve and I are often stretched, pulled, and tossed around so we will continue to grow and continue to inspire those around us; but in order to have that positive impact we want, we have to keep it together right now.
I will be blogging daily, because this has helped me get some accountability back in my life. Making sure I blog after I do yoga and meditate is building some consistency that I so desperately need right now.
Thanks for supporting us near and far, and for loving us. You all help us in more ways than I could ever explain.
Sometimes being authentic is hard hard hard....but self love helps.
In an effort to be authentic with ya'all, I will tell you today I woke up in a pool of self loathing, that even writing a blog seems like a facade. Let me explain a little bit of what I mean.
I've grown to see myself how I want to be, as it helps me to be the person I want to be. I want to be loving, kind, patient, strong, supportive, open, and authentic. Well yesterday and last night for reasons I can't always understand snippy Hope came out and well, I of course made it a point to make Steve feel like a burden for waking me up in the middle of the night. I think the words were, "Ugh have respect for my time and stop being so needy when I'm sleeping."
Insert the defeated emoji face. It breaks me, to see me like this.
So some of you are thinking, Hope you're being hard on yourself, middle of the night grumpies are normal. Sure? Maybe they used to be normal, but I don't want to be grumpy for my helpless husband needing me in the middle of the night. So it made me feel pretty crappy today.
Just one day of being less than I want makes me sad, because I WANT to be that person I see myself as. I want to be loving, patient, kind, and supportive. I don't want to snap just because I'm a little weary. While meditating today, the words were floating around in my head, this is MY time, stop interrupting it. I kept trying to shake them away, and on one exhale Marlowe (our black lab) came over to me unprompted and started kissing my face. She's always so in tune to me.
She was showing me love, and somehow my thoughts shifted in that moment; to show myself some love today. With love comes forgiveness. Gosh, the amount of times Steve and I have forgiven each other and ourselves, it's what marriage is about right. Forgiveness. Honestly, it's what life is about. I started breathing the word, forgiveness, in and really focus on feeling it. By the end of the 20 minutes I knew I felt okay enough to get through our wound care morning without beating myself up; and I also knew I needed to blog about it.
I know some of you may wonder why I share these things. I know you're wondering it because sometimes I wonder it myself, but truth is; the more vulnerable and real I am with everyone the more we all grow. It helps me grow to hold myself accountable and share the dark sides and how I work through them, and I hope it gives everyone courage to be able to look at theirs too. Looking at our weaknesses isn't fun, but it's powerful.
So today, after wound care, I have a self love date with myself. Because as much love as I put out to Steve and others in our world, I need to make sure I'm giving myself the same. Often times I'm leaving myself weary by trying to be everything for everyone and these episode of grumpies are often an indicator that it's time to take a break from super hope and work on some self love time.
Today's self love = messy paint times. My favorite thing.
I've grown to see myself how I want to be, as it helps me to be the person I want to be. I want to be loving, kind, patient, strong, supportive, open, and authentic. Well yesterday and last night for reasons I can't always understand snippy Hope came out and well, I of course made it a point to make Steve feel like a burden for waking me up in the middle of the night. I think the words were, "Ugh have respect for my time and stop being so needy when I'm sleeping."
Insert the defeated emoji face. It breaks me, to see me like this.
So some of you are thinking, Hope you're being hard on yourself, middle of the night grumpies are normal. Sure? Maybe they used to be normal, but I don't want to be grumpy for my helpless husband needing me in the middle of the night. So it made me feel pretty crappy today.
Just one day of being less than I want makes me sad, because I WANT to be that person I see myself as. I want to be loving, patient, kind, and supportive. I don't want to snap just because I'm a little weary. While meditating today, the words were floating around in my head, this is MY time, stop interrupting it. I kept trying to shake them away, and on one exhale Marlowe (our black lab) came over to me unprompted and started kissing my face. She's always so in tune to me.
She was showing me love, and somehow my thoughts shifted in that moment; to show myself some love today. With love comes forgiveness. Gosh, the amount of times Steve and I have forgiven each other and ourselves, it's what marriage is about right. Forgiveness. Honestly, it's what life is about. I started breathing the word, forgiveness, in and really focus on feeling it. By the end of the 20 minutes I knew I felt okay enough to get through our wound care morning without beating myself up; and I also knew I needed to blog about it.
I know some of you may wonder why I share these things. I know you're wondering it because sometimes I wonder it myself, but truth is; the more vulnerable and real I am with everyone the more we all grow. It helps me grow to hold myself accountable and share the dark sides and how I work through them, and I hope it gives everyone courage to be able to look at theirs too. Looking at our weaknesses isn't fun, but it's powerful.
So today, after wound care, I have a self love date with myself. Because as much love as I put out to Steve and others in our world, I need to make sure I'm giving myself the same. Often times I'm leaving myself weary by trying to be everything for everyone and these episode of grumpies are often an indicator that it's time to take a break from super hope and work on some self love time.
Today's self love = messy paint times. My favorite thing.
Again I use feedback to prompt writing...
I have come to realize that the feedback that you all give us so generously in all forums, greatly influences my writing. In this journey, and I'm sure many others can relate, I don't always know what to share and what to keep to myself. I've always been sort of an over sharer, I'm just really an open book; but sometimes the vulnerability can leave me wanting to hide in the closet instead of sharing.
So yesterday I got a message from someone asking me, "How do you outwardly appear so happy but also share the struggle you have with ALS?" This person explained to me how they had been a caregiver for someone with ALS and that they struggled with this everyday; trying to find joy in the rubble as they put it. They then asked, "How does one know if you're being genuine when you share one story about your struggle, and in the same day you're posing with your paintings smiling?"
So this is a fair question, and I hope y'all don't mind that I tend to blog from feedback. Honestly, it just makes me think if one persons thinking it, I'm sure others are too; so why not use it as a prompt as to what to blog about. *Also note, this person did not have bad intentions, so no negative thinking towards them; they asked a question from the heart and I appreciate it.
You all know this by now, that I don't like using overused quotes; but sometimes they are so relevant I can't help it. So.
"Not everyday is good, but something good happens everyday."
This quote is what first came to mind when I was reading this message, but it's really much more than just these simple words. Truth is that yes we are in the thick of it. Steve's been on this journey for 5 years this August, and when I think of the complications he's faced it astounds me; his beautiful spirit has not been broken. I sometimes look back and wonder how we've made it through each trial, because this one currently seems like it's going to break us.
We've had this sore now for a month and a half, and we've made strides in healing it mainly by doing wound care almost everyday. That's excruciating pain for Steve for hours at a time everyday. It's exhausting for all involved, while also encouraging. As Steve moves more, the movement becomes a tiny bit less traumatic each day, his lungs are showing signs of clearing for the first time in 4 years, and the sore is healing. Nothing will teach you patience quite like waiting for a sore to heal, they take time.
So as we are making progress we see a light at the end of the tunnel when suddenly Steve gets a hemorrhoid. Steve already having anemia of chronic diseases, when he looses any blood his body wants to shut down. We went a tiny step backwards on the progress of healing because his body had to use all it's strength to rebuild blood. (Note: If you're pALS has this, pure absorb liquid iron is your secret weapon).
So again, we are hit. It's hard not to give in to that defeated feeling, but this is the most important thing, is to not give in. The truth is yes these days are hard, and we are feeling a bit weary, and poor Steve has no energy to even type on the tobii, to play the stock market, or even follow his sports like he loves. One thing it can't take however, is the joy that Steve's still here with us. He's still choosing to battle this disease and he's doing it on his terms; at home in his bed surrounded by pups, birds, friends, and family. He still gives me a smile every time I walk in the room, and he still gets excited with every bird that comes to visit. Truth is, as long as he's still alive, I'm thankful. As long as he's still able to smile at me and give me that twinkle in his eye, of course I will still find joy in my life.
If I don't find a way to refuel everyday for Steve, I wouldn't be able to do this job. It's hard and it affects me, you may not see it; but take one look at my skin and it shows. Of course it's hard to see the one you love most struggle, but it's also inspiring and a poignant reminder. How could I not see everyday as a gift, and find the beauty all around us everyday? How could I not, when him being ALIVE today is the biggest gift of all. He still smiles after we finally get him comfortable from moving and says, "Thank you for helping me I love you." How can I not see the beauty in that?
So yes, while I feel the struggle of this journey, I also feel the gift. The gift is I have my hands, legs, eyes, mobility, I can breathe on my own, I have a voice, I have talents that sure as hell don't deserve to be wasted,... So yes, I will share how much we are struggling with this situation currently and then I will paint it out (or whatever activity I choose that day). Some days all I can muster to be thankful for is another day around the sun, and that's okay. Trust me the days you don't see smiling photos with me covered in paint are the days, I'm just sitting and starring at the fish swimming in my pond offering thanks for just making it through the day.
I hope this helps some of you in the struggle. I know it's hard to find the beauty because some days it's so hidden in the muck, but t's still there.
First action, then prayer.
I've been sharing with you all my recent journey to feel life, even the hard stuff. To really face it, sit in it, and come out the other side.
Yesterday I couldn't figure out "how to sit" with all that was going on around me. Between things with Steve and the world I was feeling too much. In conversation there have been several people (who I won't call out on the blog), tell me "Give it to God and let it go," or the popular, "Give it light and love and let it go."
So sure, there is a time and a place for these phrases. However, I feel like there's been a lot of giving it to God and not a lot of action. We need action. I understand I'm limited with what I can do in our situation and that trying to take on too much is useless because it will lead to burn out and frustration.
For whatever reason people like to read what I write in different forums, and for that it makes me feel like this is my call to action. To use my voice to speak out for what I believe in. If we all used whatever skills we had to bring action and change instead of just giving it to God, we can make a much bigger difference. Interestingly enough the Dali Lama talked about it yesterday. He said, "Real change comes through action....then on top of that some prayer."
This is how I imagine God when he hears prayer and sees very little action. (note:I'm not quoting or suggesting by any means I know what God thinks, just making a point.)
Insert prayer for planet/country/violence.
God, "I would love to help you dear ones, just as soon as you all learn to help yourselves."
In my mind I feel like it is OUR responsibility as humans to solve problems we've created. What can we do? I've been doing some serious brain storming on what I can do, and the best I've come up with is to write about it. So I will be over the next several days, in hopes that it can inspire those WHO can, to DO. Most of us are capable of doing SOMETHING to help.
Here's one thought I will leave you with and will blog about this subject a little more in depth the next couple days. I keep thinking about the saying, "Hurt people, hurt people." Are we reaching out to those hurting around us? There's so many stories and different speculations about why this man decided to shoot 50 people and injure many more; and from what I can see is that he was a hurt person, who decided to hurt other people to try to stop the hurt.
If you see someone hurting. Talk to them, hear them, send them love. The more we try to connect with one another the more we can try to eliminate the hate, the pain, and the senseless violence. I know my time is limited and I don't have it to put on my therapist cap for everyone I come in contact with, but if I listen to just one hurting person, and can help them feel loved and come back to love; I've done enough. We don't have to think about helping everyone, because only one person did this crime this past weekend. If someone had gotten to talk to him where would we be today?
Where do you feel called to action? Share with me if you're feeling it.
I love you all. xo
Yesterday I couldn't figure out "how to sit" with all that was going on around me. Between things with Steve and the world I was feeling too much. In conversation there have been several people (who I won't call out on the blog), tell me "Give it to God and let it go," or the popular, "Give it light and love and let it go."
So sure, there is a time and a place for these phrases. However, I feel like there's been a lot of giving it to God and not a lot of action. We need action. I understand I'm limited with what I can do in our situation and that trying to take on too much is useless because it will lead to burn out and frustration.
For whatever reason people like to read what I write in different forums, and for that it makes me feel like this is my call to action. To use my voice to speak out for what I believe in. If we all used whatever skills we had to bring action and change instead of just giving it to God, we can make a much bigger difference. Interestingly enough the Dali Lama talked about it yesterday. He said, "Real change comes through action....then on top of that some prayer."
This is how I imagine God when he hears prayer and sees very little action. (note:I'm not quoting or suggesting by any means I know what God thinks, just making a point.)
Insert prayer for planet/country/violence.
God, "I would love to help you dear ones, just as soon as you all learn to help yourselves."
In my mind I feel like it is OUR responsibility as humans to solve problems we've created. What can we do? I've been doing some serious brain storming on what I can do, and the best I've come up with is to write about it. So I will be over the next several days, in hopes that it can inspire those WHO can, to DO. Most of us are capable of doing SOMETHING to help.
Here's one thought I will leave you with and will blog about this subject a little more in depth the next couple days. I keep thinking about the saying, "Hurt people, hurt people." Are we reaching out to those hurting around us? There's so many stories and different speculations about why this man decided to shoot 50 people and injure many more; and from what I can see is that he was a hurt person, who decided to hurt other people to try to stop the hurt.
If you see someone hurting. Talk to them, hear them, send them love. The more we try to connect with one another the more we can try to eliminate the hate, the pain, and the senseless violence. I know my time is limited and I don't have it to put on my therapist cap for everyone I come in contact with, but if I listen to just one hurting person, and can help them feel loved and come back to love; I've done enough. We don't have to think about helping everyone, because only one person did this crime this past weekend. If someone had gotten to talk to him where would we be today?
Where do you feel called to action? Share with me if you're feeling it.
I love you all. xo
Love really is the answer
Okay i'll be honest my emotions are all over the place today. Between the journey we've been on with Steve the past few months and the Orlando tragedy yesterday, I can't think of anything more important to write about than love.
Love after all is what fuels me on days like today where I'm getting ready to do our 2 hour bath/wound care/positioning with Steve in 30 minutes. How am I going to do it my weary mind thinks? The answer is love.
The only answer I have to the massive amount of hate that was shown in this Orlando tragedy is to show more love. I have always wanted to leave a positive impact on people I come in contact with, but truth be told it's those out there that don't see love that I need to reach. Those that are full of hate, anger, hurt, or whatever it is; those are the people I want to reach. Those are the people we NEED to reach. If I could help one person who feels nothing but hatred and anger to feel love, and to give love. Then i'll be making the impact I want on the world.
That's what I want. I want to reach those who are so far to the dark side, they think what they did was okay. I don't have to understand why they think it's okay even, I just have to show them that LOVE really is what the answer is. Love is the only thing that will fix all the madness going on in the world.
So today I am going to do the only thing I know how to do, I am going to take some time out of my day and send out love. I will send it to every family member who lost someone in this senseless act, to every single person in the club that night, to their friends and family, to the whole LGBT community, to our whole world, and yes; even to the man who did this hate crime. Because clearly he needs love.
Show everyone you meet love, and allow it to fuel you. Let's be the difference we need in this country. No more pointing fingers as to who was in the wrong; we already know the answers to that. Let's make it stop already. No more violence, no more senseless tragedies, no more hate. ONLY LOVE.
Love will find a way. <3
Love after all is what fuels me on days like today where I'm getting ready to do our 2 hour bath/wound care/positioning with Steve in 30 minutes. How am I going to do it my weary mind thinks? The answer is love.
The only answer I have to the massive amount of hate that was shown in this Orlando tragedy is to show more love. I have always wanted to leave a positive impact on people I come in contact with, but truth be told it's those out there that don't see love that I need to reach. Those that are full of hate, anger, hurt, or whatever it is; those are the people I want to reach. Those are the people we NEED to reach. If I could help one person who feels nothing but hatred and anger to feel love, and to give love. Then i'll be making the impact I want on the world.
That's what I want. I want to reach those who are so far to the dark side, they think what they did was okay. I don't have to understand why they think it's okay even, I just have to show them that LOVE really is what the answer is. Love is the only thing that will fix all the madness going on in the world.
So today I am going to do the only thing I know how to do, I am going to take some time out of my day and send out love. I will send it to every family member who lost someone in this senseless act, to every single person in the club that night, to their friends and family, to the whole LGBT community, to our whole world, and yes; even to the man who did this hate crime. Because clearly he needs love.
Show everyone you meet love, and allow it to fuel you. Let's be the difference we need in this country. No more pointing fingers as to who was in the wrong; we already know the answers to that. Let's make it stop already. No more violence, no more senseless tragedies, no more hate. ONLY LOVE.
Love will find a way. <3
Inspiration.
in·spi·ra·tion
What a beautiful word with beautiful meaning.
I'd like to think we all want inspired lives. We all want those moments of inspired creativity in whatever area of work we do. The author is inspired to finish his book, painter, scientist, designer, creator, etc. We all draw sources of inspiration in our life. We make inspo boards to look at to draw ideas from, we hang pictures of our inspirations, we create spaces to seek inspiration from, surround ourselves with people who inspire us, follow their lives on the internet world, we watch the movies, listen to the songs, etc....
Then I read number 2. The drawing in of breath; inhalation. It makes me think of another interpretation of this; how often do we inspire ourselves? I know I draw a lot of inspiration from people around me, and one of my favorite compliments is when someone tells me I've inspired them. It's a moment where I can see me living my life out loud has positively impacted someone else's life. Don't we all want that? Of course, but what about inspiring ourselves? We take the beautiful gift of drawing in a breath, and we allow that to truly be inspiration.
Let me make this as simple as I can. The act of being able to draw in air into your own lungs without a machine is pretty damn inspirational. You have that ability. What a gift to be given. I don't know how often we think about it when we take in a breath, unless it's intentional; that this breath I'm breathing is inspired living. If we can all look at life this way think of the things we could do in our lives. Constantly inspired by the act of taking in a breath.
Let's live life more in awe. Inspired by things we easily take for granted. In case this isn't sinking in here are some simple examples: "I'm so inspired by my ability to move my legs, I think i'll go for a walk today." "I'm so inspired by my ability to see, I think i'll look deeply at EVERYTHING I see on my walk." I'm so inspired by my ability to breath, I think I'll write about it." "I'm so inspired by my ability to use my hands, I think I'll create with them."................
Every moment of this life can offer those beautiful moments of inspired living. Don't let that magic go. Don't forget that simply being able to breathe on your own, is inspiration enough to live your life the way you've always wanted to.
ˌinspəˈrāSH(ə)n/
noun
- 1.the process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something, especially to do something creative."Helen had one of her flashes of inspiration"
synonyms: creativity, inventiveness, innovation, ingenuity, genius, imagination, originality; More - 2.the drawing in of breath; inhalation.
What a beautiful word with beautiful meaning.
I'd like to think we all want inspired lives. We all want those moments of inspired creativity in whatever area of work we do. The author is inspired to finish his book, painter, scientist, designer, creator, etc. We all draw sources of inspiration in our life. We make inspo boards to look at to draw ideas from, we hang pictures of our inspirations, we create spaces to seek inspiration from, surround ourselves with people who inspire us, follow their lives on the internet world, we watch the movies, listen to the songs, etc....
Then I read number 2. The drawing in of breath; inhalation. It makes me think of another interpretation of this; how often do we inspire ourselves? I know I draw a lot of inspiration from people around me, and one of my favorite compliments is when someone tells me I've inspired them. It's a moment where I can see me living my life out loud has positively impacted someone else's life. Don't we all want that? Of course, but what about inspiring ourselves? We take the beautiful gift of drawing in a breath, and we allow that to truly be inspiration.
Let me make this as simple as I can. The act of being able to draw in air into your own lungs without a machine is pretty damn inspirational. You have that ability. What a gift to be given. I don't know how often we think about it when we take in a breath, unless it's intentional; that this breath I'm breathing is inspired living. If we can all look at life this way think of the things we could do in our lives. Constantly inspired by the act of taking in a breath.
Let's live life more in awe. Inspired by things we easily take for granted. In case this isn't sinking in here are some simple examples: "I'm so inspired by my ability to move my legs, I think i'll go for a walk today." "I'm so inspired by my ability to see, I think i'll look deeply at EVERYTHING I see on my walk." I'm so inspired by my ability to breath, I think I'll write about it." "I'm so inspired by my ability to use my hands, I think I'll create with them."................
Every moment of this life can offer those beautiful moments of inspired living. Don't let that magic go. Don't forget that simply being able to breathe on your own, is inspiration enough to live your life the way you've always wanted to.