Raise the vibration, please.
We interrupt this scheduled climate change blog, for yet again a discussion on the violence in our world. For those of you who follow my blog closely, you know Steve and I prepared you a blog for today, but after waking up to news of 84 people being killed in France; I must write on this.
I want to acknowledge the sadness I feel about the fact that I am writing another blog on the loss of innocent lives. It's heartbreaking and no matter where it's happening; I'm feeling it. I also am holding on to the hope, that all of this is really an awakening that will be tumultuous at first, but ultimately lead to more peace and love winning.
This isn't just a blog on hope, it's a blog on action. I've seen several different people attempt to start this, with little traction; but to me it's a huge thing that EVERYONE can do. I know a lot of you out there want to be doing something, anything, that can be helping find our world some peace.
It's time to raise our vibration as a whole. For those of you who have no idea what I mean, I'll explain in simple terms. Everything is energy, and we are all vibrating energy. Think of someone you meet, and they are full of anger and hate, does it feel very fun to be around them? Are their vibes bringing you down or raising you up? I can tell you the 100's of times I felt other people's negative energy and had to either remove them from my life or raise my vibration enough to be unaffected by them. This is the vibration our world is full of right now, hate, anger, fear, sadness; low low low vibrations. Then imagine yourself around someone who is full of love and joy and seeks to see the positive things. Now think about how they make you feel, They lift you up right? Their vibes bring you up to their level and continue to build you up. That's what we need more of in this world right now.
So how do we do it? There's a few ways in which I have learned to raise my vibrations, and I would like to share, and then encourage you all to find a way to do this for yourself EVERY SINGLE DAY. Don't let the word vibration put you off, it's simple physics and no it doesn't go against the bible (as yes I know some of you are thinking it) so hear me out.
3 simple steps. :)
First way is meditation. Meditation is honestly something I think everyone could benefit from. It seems so daunting to some people or too spiritual for others. Let me tell you, that learning to find that space that comes in silent breath work is the most powerful thing I've ever done for myself. You don't have to try to meditate for hours, even 5 minutes of sitting in silence and focusing on the breath is enough. If you've never meditated there are some great apps (insight timer app is a favorite) and guided meditations (David Jii is a favorite) out there, even some mandala meditations that Steve and I recently have found ourselves falling in love with. But you don't need any of that, or a fancy cushion, sacred space, incense, or anything. You just need to be truly aware of your being in this moment and just breathe. Sometimes the thought of silence is daunting to others, so even if you need a mantra (a phrase you say repeatedly with your breath) that's okay too. I often use mantra's. For example one of my favorites is to breathe in, "I Am love," and to breathe out, "I give love."
Second is prayer. Now I know the word pray, has such a loaded meaning to some and others it's like breathing right. To me, there's no wrong or right way to pray, no matter who it is you're praying to. It doesn't matter what "God" you pray to, and please don't come at me with anything negative in response to that. Everyone is entitled to believe in whomever and whatever they please. I want this message to be so widely spread that everyone feels okay to say a prayer. The results are the same, you are asking "God" whatever that may be to you, to help. Although, my favorite prayers are often to give thanks. When I offer a simple prayer of gratitude daily, I find myself more and more aware of the blessings life offers, even in the darkness.
Third is a big one. Show kindness to EVERYONE you come in contact with. Smile at people as you walk past them. You know the power of a smile? One day during a very dark time with Steve, he was in the hospital and I had decided to go to whole foods. I was feeling very low, and a woman who could probably read the energy smiled at me and said, "I hope this smile fills you up," and walked away. It did fill me up that day, and it changed my energy with one simple act. There's hundreds of ways to show kindness: carry groceries, hold the door, say hello, pick up trash you see on the ground (kindness to the planet counts big time here), buy someone lunch, pay for the person behind you's coffee, compliment someone, listen to someone having a hard time, donate to someones cause today, surprise someone with a gift, etc. Kindness is easy and EVERYONE can do it.
Let's do our part and collectively raise our vibration and drive out this darkness. Because remember "Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that," isn't just an amazing quote from the great Martin Luther King Jr; it's the truth. A vibration of LOVE is what we desperately need.
I already meditate, pray, and try to show kindness daily; but I intend to increase all with a large focus on love and peace. Because from where I sit, it's how I see everyone being able to participate in the change.
Will you please join me?
I want to acknowledge the sadness I feel about the fact that I am writing another blog on the loss of innocent lives. It's heartbreaking and no matter where it's happening; I'm feeling it. I also am holding on to the hope, that all of this is really an awakening that will be tumultuous at first, but ultimately lead to more peace and love winning.
This isn't just a blog on hope, it's a blog on action. I've seen several different people attempt to start this, with little traction; but to me it's a huge thing that EVERYONE can do. I know a lot of you out there want to be doing something, anything, that can be helping find our world some peace.
It's time to raise our vibration as a whole. For those of you who have no idea what I mean, I'll explain in simple terms. Everything is energy, and we are all vibrating energy. Think of someone you meet, and they are full of anger and hate, does it feel very fun to be around them? Are their vibes bringing you down or raising you up? I can tell you the 100's of times I felt other people's negative energy and had to either remove them from my life or raise my vibration enough to be unaffected by them. This is the vibration our world is full of right now, hate, anger, fear, sadness; low low low vibrations. Then imagine yourself around someone who is full of love and joy and seeks to see the positive things. Now think about how they make you feel, They lift you up right? Their vibes bring you up to their level and continue to build you up. That's what we need more of in this world right now.
So how do we do it? There's a few ways in which I have learned to raise my vibrations, and I would like to share, and then encourage you all to find a way to do this for yourself EVERY SINGLE DAY. Don't let the word vibration put you off, it's simple physics and no it doesn't go against the bible (as yes I know some of you are thinking it) so hear me out.
3 simple steps. :)
First way is meditation. Meditation is honestly something I think everyone could benefit from. It seems so daunting to some people or too spiritual for others. Let me tell you, that learning to find that space that comes in silent breath work is the most powerful thing I've ever done for myself. You don't have to try to meditate for hours, even 5 minutes of sitting in silence and focusing on the breath is enough. If you've never meditated there are some great apps (insight timer app is a favorite) and guided meditations (David Jii is a favorite) out there, even some mandala meditations that Steve and I recently have found ourselves falling in love with. But you don't need any of that, or a fancy cushion, sacred space, incense, or anything. You just need to be truly aware of your being in this moment and just breathe. Sometimes the thought of silence is daunting to others, so even if you need a mantra (a phrase you say repeatedly with your breath) that's okay too. I often use mantra's. For example one of my favorites is to breathe in, "I Am love," and to breathe out, "I give love."
Second is prayer. Now I know the word pray, has such a loaded meaning to some and others it's like breathing right. To me, there's no wrong or right way to pray, no matter who it is you're praying to. It doesn't matter what "God" you pray to, and please don't come at me with anything negative in response to that. Everyone is entitled to believe in whomever and whatever they please. I want this message to be so widely spread that everyone feels okay to say a prayer. The results are the same, you are asking "God" whatever that may be to you, to help. Although, my favorite prayers are often to give thanks. When I offer a simple prayer of gratitude daily, I find myself more and more aware of the blessings life offers, even in the darkness.
Third is a big one. Show kindness to EVERYONE you come in contact with. Smile at people as you walk past them. You know the power of a smile? One day during a very dark time with Steve, he was in the hospital and I had decided to go to whole foods. I was feeling very low, and a woman who could probably read the energy smiled at me and said, "I hope this smile fills you up," and walked away. It did fill me up that day, and it changed my energy with one simple act. There's hundreds of ways to show kindness: carry groceries, hold the door, say hello, pick up trash you see on the ground (kindness to the planet counts big time here), buy someone lunch, pay for the person behind you's coffee, compliment someone, listen to someone having a hard time, donate to someones cause today, surprise someone with a gift, etc. Kindness is easy and EVERYONE can do it.
Let's do our part and collectively raise our vibration and drive out this darkness. Because remember "Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that," isn't just an amazing quote from the great Martin Luther King Jr; it's the truth. A vibration of LOVE is what we desperately need.
I already meditate, pray, and try to show kindness daily; but I intend to increase all with a large focus on love and peace. Because from where I sit, it's how I see everyone being able to participate in the change.
Will you please join me?
Discernment...
Almost everyday I do some reflection on what message I want to get out with my blog that day. The past two weeks I have been so focused on more love, more community, more respect; both for people and the planet. I noticed that some of my messages are being heard loud and clear, and the response is pretty awesome. Some however, seem like the message is being missed. Like, maybe people aren't hearing (reading) me clearly, or at all.
I had a lovely conversation with my dear friend, and Ayurveda teacher Anna yesterday that sort of helped me understand why some of my messages were going as far and deep as I intended and some aren't. Of course our conversation started with what's going on with us but had to include what's going on in the world. Because as she often teaches, we are the microcosm of the macrocosm, meaning the world you live in heavily influences your life and well being. In the conversation she said several things that my mind turned into a blog, but one in particular that helped me understand why some messages are being heard more than others. "It's important to have the discernment of knowing where you want your message to come from."
So there you have it, yesterdays message was one of desperation, right? After watching Josh Fox's film I went into the desperate act of trying to get everyone to see his side of this, and why climate change should be in your wheelhouse. Instead I should have said it this way, because this is where his message came from, and where mine should be as well. Our planet is beautiful, life is beautiful, it's all a precious gift. Truth is, that there is so much good left in this world, that is being heavily muddied down because there are some serious negatives happening. As things start to reveal themselves as truth rather than theory more and more this year, it's causing a lot of panic and anger. Which, are normal, and maybe even needed; but I think more effective is love.
We all are blessed to be alive here today, and if you're reading this, you have access to technology, and I'll assume probably food, clothing, shelter, and clean water. What an incredible gift. Truth is however, it's not that way for everyone. So not only is it becoming worse, it's happening in the US now. It's been happening in the US for a while, but it was sort of contained. See, I grew up from 4th-9th grade without drinkable water, because due to mining the lands beside my house our water was taken over by iron and who knows what fossil fuels. That was in the 90's and it wasn't ever spoken about. We couldn't afford water purification systems so we didn't use our water. However, we were fortunate enough to live close to some of the best spring water in our area that was clean and delicious (linn run) and we would go fill up gallons of water to cook, bathe, and drink with.
The problems started in obscure areas, where they were contaminating our beautiful planet, but it was too small to be noticed. Fast forward to today, and as much as we all want to be hiding from it, it's not possible anymore. It's here on our front door steps, and it's hard for people to want to see it. So with love, I want to empower us. Because it all seems so daunting right? Let me tell you, you reading this, you have power. A lot of power in fact. We all do. Whether we fully realize it or not. That's why I keep saying we have to do something, it's because we can. For once in our lifetimes, the truths are being shown to us, pretty clearly in fact. It is actually a gift to finally be in the know, however, the trick is, that it's truly a personal choice whether or not you truly want to see it.
It reminds me of how people can turn their TVs off when they just don't want to face something, because they feel so out of control about it.
We have very little control over things these days; other people, our government, the weather, etc, but we do have control over our choices. Which means we have the opportunity to be part of the solution. What an incredible gift to be given. The chance to stand up for what's right. So my next few blogs will be a way to educate you on some VERY easy ways in which you CAN help. I truly hope you feel empowered after reading each one, and know that you are important in this world. Every single one of you.
Today starts with this, acceptance of the truth. Acceptance that there is a problem, and that we can actually help. It's a gift, to be able to help be a part of a solution, and I truly feel thankful that I can do my part, and hopefully the impact lasts for lifetimes after mine.
PS: Tomorrow will include some thoughts from Steve, because he heavily believes environmental factors played a role in his ALS diagnosis. So stay tuned.
Love all of you powerful, capable, lovely human beings. <3
Consume me no more...
If you've followed Steve and I long enough, you know our pain we feel for our planet. We watched Josh Fox's latest film (I beg EVERYONE reading this to please watch) How to let go of the world and love all the things climate can't change, twice in the past 3 days. His films always shake me and get me fired up to speak out about the planet.
I have so much to say about this film, that it will probably be one that I talk about in several blogs. Today I want to focus on one part of the film, that hit me like a ton of bricks.
Consumerism.
Inhale. Exhale.
Ahh, I have been so brainwashed and guilty of falling into the consumerism trap. I work hard to try to do my part here for the planet. No meat, no dairy, only supporting sustainable farming, recycle queen, using less, using more things provided by nature in my creations, etc. Where I have fallen very short, is my consumerism. My attachment to things. I'm owning my part here.
Sigh. As I'm trying to organize my piles of stuff, next to my other piles of stuff, while the piles of that stuff over there come falling down, it makes me sad. How did I fall into this trap? Here's a truth I'm going to drop on y'all. Our world, is telling us we NEED these things in order to be happy. We are being told essentially to consume consume consume because we need to have all the greatest things. I mean after all we deserve them right?
Ugh. Why do we deserve to breathe clean air, while we outsource our clothes making to China leaving them with heavily polluted air? Why do we deserve clean water while chemicals are being dumped into the world daily from large factories manufacturing all this STUFF we just all need so much? Why do I need another piece of clothing? Why do I find myself addicted to stuff?
So many questions, and I'm here with an answer. There's some stuff that will take some major action to get government to change (ie fracking, oil spills, deforestation) but we have to do our parts. It's up to us to step up and take action, and when we change we will see our leaders change. So here's what I'm going to do and ask you all to consider. This one is an actual achievable goal.
NO MORE consumerism in 5 easy steps. (I could do more, but I understand change is hard so let's keep it simple here). I ask that if it's something you all can see doing, please do so, and share about it. Even if you only do 1 step, it will help.
Step 1. Not one more "It's so pretty" treats to myself. No more clothes, shoes, bags, whatever that catches my eye, and I say, "I deserve to have a happy treat." No more. There's no excuse for it. I don't need a new swim suit every summer, or that new dress that's being advertised to me in 20 different outlets. The cost of each piece of mass produced clothing to our planet is astounding. Plus, how many clothes do you actually need? (Hope?)
Step 2. I have a ton of things in my house I never use, time to actually sort through and offer them to people who need them, instead of them buying that item. Helping others stop the cycle.
Step 3. If I do need something new, something breaks here; FIND A USED ONE. The reality is there is an existing & usable EVERYTHING in existence right now, our need for new just takes over. Oh I want a new fridge, or a new washing machine. Although, there's one here on Craig's list in great condition, refurbished, and working like new. Ugh. Used is seen as such a bad word sometimes. I think we should now start saying, "Already existing so buy that and save the damn planet."
Step 4. Be Sustainable and conscious about my creations. I want the art I make to be a gift to the planet, and not another burden. I already use a ton of natural materials, but I can and will do better.
Step 5. No more ordering out, when I have food to cook. This is another big big thing for me. When we have a tough day, I will justify ordering food, although I have food to cook in my fridge. I say, "Oh, I deserve someone else to cook for me for a change." Really? You know there's people who don't get to have any food, and yet I think, it's okay for someone to take the gas to pick up the food, the plastic containers that no matter how much I recycle STILL exist in this world just to get food. (Sad fact: every piece of plastic ever made, still exists today, it doesn't decompose, ever.) Seriously? This is laziness. Not to mention I speak positive intentions and love into my food. With other people cooking it, who knows how fresh, organic, or well intended their food is?
Look there's a lot happening in our world, and a large part of it has to do with our total lack of respect; for people and the planet. If you find it okay to throw trash anywhere but a garbage can, that speaks volumes of you as a person. It's a lack of respect. It's time we all start actually holding ourselves accountable.
So many people won't watch this film, may not even read this blog; because they don't want to admit there is a problem. They don't want to be burdened with it, because nothings happening here right now, so it can't be that bad? Well it is happening, and y'all just think it's coincidence. I promise if we don't stop this type of thinking, things are going to get worse. More droughts, more fires, more floods, more natural disasters, more killing, more war, more poverty, more hunger,....
You don't want to be burdened? WAKE UP. Let's come together and FIX this. It starts with us. Again I end this blog with, IT IS UP TO US. We can and NEED to be doing better.
I have so much to say about this film, that it will probably be one that I talk about in several blogs. Today I want to focus on one part of the film, that hit me like a ton of bricks.
Consumerism.
Inhale. Exhale.
Ahh, I have been so brainwashed and guilty of falling into the consumerism trap. I work hard to try to do my part here for the planet. No meat, no dairy, only supporting sustainable farming, recycle queen, using less, using more things provided by nature in my creations, etc. Where I have fallen very short, is my consumerism. My attachment to things. I'm owning my part here.
Sigh. As I'm trying to organize my piles of stuff, next to my other piles of stuff, while the piles of that stuff over there come falling down, it makes me sad. How did I fall into this trap? Here's a truth I'm going to drop on y'all. Our world, is telling us we NEED these things in order to be happy. We are being told essentially to consume consume consume because we need to have all the greatest things. I mean after all we deserve them right?
Ugh. Why do we deserve to breathe clean air, while we outsource our clothes making to China leaving them with heavily polluted air? Why do we deserve clean water while chemicals are being dumped into the world daily from large factories manufacturing all this STUFF we just all need so much? Why do I need another piece of clothing? Why do I find myself addicted to stuff?
So many questions, and I'm here with an answer. There's some stuff that will take some major action to get government to change (ie fracking, oil spills, deforestation) but we have to do our parts. It's up to us to step up and take action, and when we change we will see our leaders change. So here's what I'm going to do and ask you all to consider. This one is an actual achievable goal.
NO MORE consumerism in 5 easy steps. (I could do more, but I understand change is hard so let's keep it simple here). I ask that if it's something you all can see doing, please do so, and share about it. Even if you only do 1 step, it will help.
Step 1. Not one more "It's so pretty" treats to myself. No more clothes, shoes, bags, whatever that catches my eye, and I say, "I deserve to have a happy treat." No more. There's no excuse for it. I don't need a new swim suit every summer, or that new dress that's being advertised to me in 20 different outlets. The cost of each piece of mass produced clothing to our planet is astounding. Plus, how many clothes do you actually need? (Hope?)
Step 2. I have a ton of things in my house I never use, time to actually sort through and offer them to people who need them, instead of them buying that item. Helping others stop the cycle.
Step 3. If I do need something new, something breaks here; FIND A USED ONE. The reality is there is an existing & usable EVERYTHING in existence right now, our need for new just takes over. Oh I want a new fridge, or a new washing machine. Although, there's one here on Craig's list in great condition, refurbished, and working like new. Ugh. Used is seen as such a bad word sometimes. I think we should now start saying, "Already existing so buy that and save the damn planet."
Step 4. Be Sustainable and conscious about my creations. I want the art I make to be a gift to the planet, and not another burden. I already use a ton of natural materials, but I can and will do better.
Step 5. No more ordering out, when I have food to cook. This is another big big thing for me. When we have a tough day, I will justify ordering food, although I have food to cook in my fridge. I say, "Oh, I deserve someone else to cook for me for a change." Really? You know there's people who don't get to have any food, and yet I think, it's okay for someone to take the gas to pick up the food, the plastic containers that no matter how much I recycle STILL exist in this world just to get food. (Sad fact: every piece of plastic ever made, still exists today, it doesn't decompose, ever.) Seriously? This is laziness. Not to mention I speak positive intentions and love into my food. With other people cooking it, who knows how fresh, organic, or well intended their food is?
Look there's a lot happening in our world, and a large part of it has to do with our total lack of respect; for people and the planet. If you find it okay to throw trash anywhere but a garbage can, that speaks volumes of you as a person. It's a lack of respect. It's time we all start actually holding ourselves accountable.
So many people won't watch this film, may not even read this blog; because they don't want to admit there is a problem. They don't want to be burdened with it, because nothings happening here right now, so it can't be that bad? Well it is happening, and y'all just think it's coincidence. I promise if we don't stop this type of thinking, things are going to get worse. More droughts, more fires, more floods, more natural disasters, more killing, more war, more poverty, more hunger,....
You don't want to be burdened? WAKE UP. Let's come together and FIX this. It starts with us. Again I end this blog with, IT IS UP TO US. We can and NEED to be doing better.
It's up to us.
With things going the way they are in the world, it's hard not to feel overcome by the negativity, but much of what I love about our beautiful world is how groups of people can come together for a common cause no matter how different they may be from one another.
See, I'm only able to be an observer in much of what is happening, since we don't leave our house for months at a time. I don't watch the news, I don't watch much TV in fact until the evenings when I'll cuddle up with Steve for a movie, or to binge a new series with him; so I'm not getting any information from a reporter. I have "hidden" 70% of my Facebook feed, and have cut out the "stare and scroll" from my life.
So I suppose some of you are wondering how I stay informed on the world's happenings. It's because in my time being here as an observer of the world, I've been able to follow closely with people on their social media platforms, and have been blessed with finding a group of like minded individuals, who have led me to sources that aren't influenced by propaganda and that simply tell the truth.
In watching these multiple groups of communities come together and stand up for what's right, I am seeing several movements starting that completely restore my hope and faith in the world. From the peaceful protests that have managed to be shining examples of how to come together to speak up for what you believe, to the multitude of videos/blogs/articles being made with people using their voices for love and peace, to what I recently discovered some of my favorite musicians doing an Up to us caravan, driving across the country to the DNC (Democratic National Convention) and making stops along the way to discuss with the ACTUAL people, problems in their areas. Click the link to see if they will be in your city, and how you can get involved.
So how does an observer like me, who doesn't have the chance to participate in all the many movements happening around the world, still stand up for what she believes in? Here's 3 ways in which I will, and you can decide if it works for you.
1. I will no longer be part of the system. I plan to blog about this in great detail in the future, but in simple terms, I will not support anything creating the hate, the divide, or simply that is destroying our planet (also a blog coming on this). I will not watch news channels trying to instill fear in me, I will not go to certain websites that are creating a divide, and I will certainly NOT allow others to make my decisions or opinions for me. Please if you're heavily being influenced by the noise happening around you, cut it off. Start to feel your own gut and trust that you DO KNOW what is right and wrong without someone else telling you what to think.
2. The second will be continue to use my voice. Look so many of us for so long, sat back afraid of not knowing the right thing to say. I openly admit I am often a loss for words, on tough situations, but when I speak from the heart, it's always right. My heart right now is telling me, NO more divide, NO more hatred, NO more fear, NO more brainwashing, NO more violence, MORE action, MORE peaceful demonstrations, MORE meaningful art and words, MORE prayers and meditation, AND most importantly more ENCOURAGING and LOVING ONE ANOTHER.
3. I WILL SHINE MY LIGHT. I often am in question as why I can't stop the pull to share so much of our lives. If you've followed me long enough, you know a very large part of me wants to be tucked away in my own corner, completely disconnected from it all and left with just the trees, birds, and squirrels. The other part of me, knows that I have to shine my light. It's not given to me to keep to myself. So, I will continue to share us working through the struggles, the insights that come to me, the inspiration I find, the art that is literally the spirit working through me. I'll continue to pray openly for everyone. I will continue to meditate and work on my own inner workings. I will continue reaching out to those in my reach, and sending LOVE to everyone I've ever known, ever. Because this little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine...
Keep it up everyone. There may be some strong strong forces trying to divide us, but it's up to us not to allow it. We can overcome this. We can make a lasting change. This is our chance, it is up to us.
Just being okay.
Inhale.
Exhale.
Inhale.
Exhale.
I'm doing a whole lot of this today. Breathing through it.
Breathing through the ALS whirlwind, the world's chaos, the Monday madness, the to do list's, the reality of it all. All of it...
Let go, let go, let go....
I have a list of powerful blogs to share, but today this is it.
Today it's learning to let go of lists, and premeditated thinking. It's letting go of control, expectations, and needs for understanding. It's letting go of thinking I can change it. It's letting go of the grips it all has on me.
It's allowing me this space to not have it all figured out, and allowing me to learn to trust the process. It's me just being.
Just being okay with everything going on. Just being okay.
That's all for today.
Exhale.
Inhale.
Exhale.
I'm doing a whole lot of this today. Breathing through it.
Breathing through the ALS whirlwind, the world's chaos, the Monday madness, the to do list's, the reality of it all. All of it...
Let go, let go, let go....
I have a list of powerful blogs to share, but today this is it.
Today it's learning to let go of lists, and premeditated thinking. It's letting go of control, expectations, and needs for understanding. It's letting go of thinking I can change it. It's letting go of the grips it all has on me.
It's allowing me this space to not have it all figured out, and allowing me to learn to trust the process. It's me just being.
Just being okay with everything going on. Just being okay.
That's all for today.
Get vulnerable with me
Writing for me began as something I had to do at school in elementary years, that I didn't do very well. My papers would have red marks covering the pages, and without my awareness, those days heavily influenced present me. As the years went on, I didn't get that much better with writing until college. I went to a school that is often mistaken for, just another party state school, but it was so much more than that. Education went beyond the classroom sure, but the classrooms did matter. Teachers were holding us accountable, but also encouraging us.
So I began to slowly play catch up with writing. Started understanding punctuation a little bit, and even a little grammar. Why suddenly was I absorbing information after years of getting the papers full of red marks telling me how I should fix things? It's because instead of the red marks on the pages, it was teachers taking time out to sit and talk with me. To sit and tell me, hey Hope you're actually capable of this; but you're going to have to do the work.
Then comes grad school. I was so confident walking into my first day for my master's degree, and my confidence was beaten away little by little in 3 years. I couldn't understand why I had come from a school, that had high standards and where I was considered successful with my endeavors, and then I was suddenly back to being labeled as, "the dumb one." It almost stopped me in my tracks. I struggled through those 3 years within school life and my home life. If it wasn't for my internship that fell on my lap, I would have let grad school completely destroy me.
My boss at this internship said something to me after being his intern for 4 months, that shifted things for me back in the right direction. He said, "Hope, I need you to know something. If you were to let go of the inner chatter about you not being smart enough to do things, you would amaze yourself. You are more capable than some of those teachers tearing you down, to change this world. You have something inside of you, that triggers people; and it's not bad unless they make it bad. Listen to me, I'm out here in this world, and I see hundreds of people in and out of here a week; you're special. You have a story, and when you work through the fears of negative feedback, you'll find your place."
He and my other boss at this job were huge influences in my life, I went on to work with them for a few years after I graduated (which is also the job where I worked when I first met Steve the 5 years before we re meet; fun fact). It took me several years of running around from job to job and person to person, until I met Steve; that I decided to start blogging.
I had started doing what I often refer to as "the work" during my time working for my favorite 2 bosses, and haven't stopped since then. The work I am referring to is simple. I am looking inside to understand how I view the world. Why do things or people trigger me? Why does my brain work certain ways? What are my shadows? How can I face them? How can I work past them? What is my light? How do I shine it? Etc. Working on understanding myself has been the most important work I've done. So when I started blogging on it, it was new to share my inner thinking's.
All my sharing previous were for class or were client assessments, nothing personal to this point. I wrote my first poorly punctuated and grammatically incorrect blog, and I felt so proud for 5 minutes. Until a group of friends I had at that time began to make fun of it. Again I'm back to grad school feelings. I'm too dumb to write. Thankfully I had Steve at the time, that reminded me the message of my blog was heard by those who weren't the grammar police, and he offered to help me edit my writings.
Blogging was something I started to do simply to share Steve's and my story. It wasn't anything else than that for me, so I thought. However, as I would continue to write blogs, opening myself up and sharing very vulnerable places, it became clear to me; that me sharing pieces of my life, is what my boss was talking about. By writing through our trials, sharing feelings, revelations, intentions, experiences,etc and removing the negative voice; I've been able to help more people than I can comprehend begin to really face their lives.
So when I was talking to a friend recently about blogging, and since I've started to do it daily; I have something I want to encourage you all to do. Let go of those red marks on the pages, those people who told you, you weren't good enough, and share your life. Being vulnerable and sharing your process of working through life openly can help anyone reading your words. Vulnerability scares people still today, and it's a place where great change can happen. The more I share my vulnerable spaces, my human experiences, and my triumphs; the more it encourages others to go deep inside and do the same.
Right now our world is in some tumultuous times and there's a lot of fear and hatred surrounding us. I've been processing how I can play a role in being the change, and I thought about this very blog. I thought about how much I want to encourage us to do the work, and look inside ourselves. We can't control the world or people around us, but we can control ourselves. How many of us ever looked inside to fully understand why you fear certain people? How many ever looked inside to why you are feeling angry or hateful? We think it's all because of someone else; but it's not them at all. It's our reactions to them, and it's up to us to start understanding where it's coming from,
I don't have it all figured out, and I used to think that meant I shouldn't write about it; but now I understand, I must. Because if my vulnerability and openness can influence one person to start sharing their stories, and they influence someone; it's a great vulnerable domino effect we are starting. I'm still learning writing skills as I continue to write, but that's the beauty of it. I've removed the need to be perfect, and started to learn just by the very act of writing more. As I'm learning about myself and my art, I'm also helping others learn about theirs. It's a win win win. :)
So I began to slowly play catch up with writing. Started understanding punctuation a little bit, and even a little grammar. Why suddenly was I absorbing information after years of getting the papers full of red marks telling me how I should fix things? It's because instead of the red marks on the pages, it was teachers taking time out to sit and talk with me. To sit and tell me, hey Hope you're actually capable of this; but you're going to have to do the work.
Then comes grad school. I was so confident walking into my first day for my master's degree, and my confidence was beaten away little by little in 3 years. I couldn't understand why I had come from a school, that had high standards and where I was considered successful with my endeavors, and then I was suddenly back to being labeled as, "the dumb one." It almost stopped me in my tracks. I struggled through those 3 years within school life and my home life. If it wasn't for my internship that fell on my lap, I would have let grad school completely destroy me.
My boss at this internship said something to me after being his intern for 4 months, that shifted things for me back in the right direction. He said, "Hope, I need you to know something. If you were to let go of the inner chatter about you not being smart enough to do things, you would amaze yourself. You are more capable than some of those teachers tearing you down, to change this world. You have something inside of you, that triggers people; and it's not bad unless they make it bad. Listen to me, I'm out here in this world, and I see hundreds of people in and out of here a week; you're special. You have a story, and when you work through the fears of negative feedback, you'll find your place."
He and my other boss at this job were huge influences in my life, I went on to work with them for a few years after I graduated (which is also the job where I worked when I first met Steve the 5 years before we re meet; fun fact). It took me several years of running around from job to job and person to person, until I met Steve; that I decided to start blogging.
I had started doing what I often refer to as "the work" during my time working for my favorite 2 bosses, and haven't stopped since then. The work I am referring to is simple. I am looking inside to understand how I view the world. Why do things or people trigger me? Why does my brain work certain ways? What are my shadows? How can I face them? How can I work past them? What is my light? How do I shine it? Etc. Working on understanding myself has been the most important work I've done. So when I started blogging on it, it was new to share my inner thinking's.
All my sharing previous were for class or were client assessments, nothing personal to this point. I wrote my first poorly punctuated and grammatically incorrect blog, and I felt so proud for 5 minutes. Until a group of friends I had at that time began to make fun of it. Again I'm back to grad school feelings. I'm too dumb to write. Thankfully I had Steve at the time, that reminded me the message of my blog was heard by those who weren't the grammar police, and he offered to help me edit my writings.
Blogging was something I started to do simply to share Steve's and my story. It wasn't anything else than that for me, so I thought. However, as I would continue to write blogs, opening myself up and sharing very vulnerable places, it became clear to me; that me sharing pieces of my life, is what my boss was talking about. By writing through our trials, sharing feelings, revelations, intentions, experiences,etc and removing the negative voice; I've been able to help more people than I can comprehend begin to really face their lives.
So when I was talking to a friend recently about blogging, and since I've started to do it daily; I have something I want to encourage you all to do. Let go of those red marks on the pages, those people who told you, you weren't good enough, and share your life. Being vulnerable and sharing your process of working through life openly can help anyone reading your words. Vulnerability scares people still today, and it's a place where great change can happen. The more I share my vulnerable spaces, my human experiences, and my triumphs; the more it encourages others to go deep inside and do the same.
Right now our world is in some tumultuous times and there's a lot of fear and hatred surrounding us. I've been processing how I can play a role in being the change, and I thought about this very blog. I thought about how much I want to encourage us to do the work, and look inside ourselves. We can't control the world or people around us, but we can control ourselves. How many of us ever looked inside to fully understand why you fear certain people? How many ever looked inside to why you are feeling angry or hateful? We think it's all because of someone else; but it's not them at all. It's our reactions to them, and it's up to us to start understanding where it's coming from,
I don't have it all figured out, and I used to think that meant I shouldn't write about it; but now I understand, I must. Because if my vulnerability and openness can influence one person to start sharing their stories, and they influence someone; it's a great vulnerable domino effect we are starting. I'm still learning writing skills as I continue to write, but that's the beauty of it. I've removed the need to be perfect, and started to learn just by the very act of writing more. As I'm learning about myself and my art, I'm also helping others learn about theirs. It's a win win win. :)